Incidents in the life of.....

Sunday, July 27, 2008

A Baby!!!!!

Hello all! Guess what...I'm pregnant. Whowouldathunkit!!! I didn't even want kids and now there is a whole body growing slowly inside of me. I'm too excited. It took three tests for the excitement to come, but once I heard that heart beat, excitement turned to elation. I love it. It's weird. I look at myself in the mirror and just marvel at the changes my body is going through. My belly is so round and my nipples are so dark. (TMI I know, but reality!) I find myself smiling for no reason and rubbing my tummy at the most awkward moments. It's just exciting. I'm so happy.
There are times when I wonder if I am doing it wrong. I wonder, did I use too much salt or too much sugar. I just read the label of my prenatals and it said take on an empty stomach. I've never done that. I eat (yes, eat) them with my meal. Sometimes I forget. I know that's terrible, but another reality. I drank tea at Golden Coral once. I only had one glass. I wanted it so bad. I know he (or she) doesn't need the caffeine, but I had a moment of weakness. Oh and I didn't know I wasn't supposed to eat shell fish, so I had a bunch of that. Not too much, but I'm sure more than normal people. I'm from the coast; so I like seafood. My momma keeps telling me I worry too much, but this is my first baby and I want him (or her) to be healthy and happy. A part of me use to worry that God would punish me for past sins and something be wrong with my baby. I had to pray and let the go.
Oh yeah, I seemed to have disappointed someone very important to me. A little lady named Audrey. I hurt her. She read me the riot act. I was kinda upset, but everything she told me I would have said to her if the roles would have been reversed. I let her down and it's going to take a while for us to mend this fence.
While we are on the difficult parts, I had to tell my pastor. In hindsight, it's kinda funny, but at the moment, it was terrible. I went to the front of the church for prayer like I always do when something is bothering me. I was just crying. Then my daddy came and it seemed like a fresh wave of tears gushed out. When Rev. Hawkins asked what was wrong, I just stood there. The words wouldn't come out. He was looking at me like I'd lost my mind. He asked my daddy what was wrong, but instead of bailing me out like I wanted him to, he just said, "Whatever she needs." Pastor asked me again. Again, I stood there looking at the floor. When he asked the third time, I had to answer. I know there had to be a big spit bubble in my mouth. It was difficult. He was very supportive. I won't go into details but he basically told me to hold my head up and be as good a mom as I am woman. Warmed my heart. I still looked at the floor, but I felt better.
Ok so back to the excitement....Everytime I go to the doctor, the heartbeat is different. The fist time, it was so slow and soft, just tiny. It was amazing. All I heard was that heartbeat. Had my mom not been there, I wouldn't even know my due date, which by the way is Dec. 23. Another time I went, it was like a double beat. Boom boom...boom boom...boom boom. The last time, it was rapid. Yoli says it beats about 150-160 times per minute. Maya says it has to be a girl. She was so excited. She swears she not having kids. Blame it on her mom and labor!
I suppose that's enough. I could go on and on, but that's enough.

Oh yeah, names....If it's a boy, his name will be Ashton Nicholas like his mommy. If it's a girl, her name will be Elizabeth Adanne. My great-great granny's name was Eliza (and boy do I wish she were here, esp. now) and Adanne is Igbo for 'Mother's Daughter.' If by some terrible stroke of misfortune, I don't make it through labor, her name will be Elizabeth Ayanti. Ayanti is Efik for 'Will you remember me?'

Ok...I'm out. Glory to the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

Posted by Nik :: 7/27/2008 :: 2 Comments: