Saturday, June 04, 2011

the 2 things that take up my time

I got my grades and I KEEP MY SCHOLARSHIP! I swear, that was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. It was easier being pregnant for nine months than it was doing nine months of law school. WHAT THE HELL? I don't wish that on anyone. I will say, I feel damn good about completing that first year and keeping my scholarship. I was so worried. You go an entire year and don't know where you stand. No quizzes. No daily grades. NOTHING. You don't even have to talk anyone. I did it though. Not only did I do it, I did it at a tier one school. I'm fucking awesome. I couldn't have done it without God. I wrote about my path being laid out for me, but sometimes my faith gets weak. God shows me everytime that I have favor. When I thought I wasn't gonna get in anywhere, I got into a tier one school. When I thought I failed that exam, I didn't. When I thought I was gonna lose my scholarship, I didn't. When I thought I wasn't gonna get a job, I got two. He just loves me and has written this great plan for my life. Thank you God. My God is an awesome God. He reigns! I gotta acknowledge those people who helped though: My ma for keeping my woman. There is no way I could have gotten the grades I got (possible I wouldn't have finished period) with my woman there. My sissy and granny for helping my ma. My bestie AshLizabeth for taking time out to tell me it's gonna be ok. I was ready to go home, driving 10East to get my woman, when she said, "Stop. Breathe. You can do this. If you wanna quit, quit, but only after you get some grades. Quit because you don't want to do it. Don't quit because you are afraid." I needed that. Thanks bestie. My babygmama Meka for listening to me that day as I walked through campus bawling. It was really bad. I had to stop and lean against the tree because I didn't want anyone to see me. I just broke. She gave me a great speech, like only she can. "Ashley, you're smart. You always have been. This is your thing. You will not fail. You don't fail at school." So true friend! Lakeysha for calling me EVERY MORNING and giving me DAILY talks about school, eating healthy, working out, and taking my vitamins. None of which I did. I love her just for being my go-to-woman. Jeremy for telling me good luck before each exam and talking through my cases with me and letting take me all of my stress out on him and getting my computer fixed bc I was losing my mind and just making me smile when I really wanted to cry and giving me those random back beatings. Lissa and Jessica for just bearing with me. I know I was not the best friend. I know ya'll were like, "This bitch is losing it!" I was! When I get lawyer money, ya'll are the first ones I'm shopping with. All three of us on the same flight!

My woman, my woman, my woman. I love that girl. She is amazing. She tells me daily how much she loves me. She can count to 11. She knows all of the colors of the rainbow, plus black, white, and gray. She can sing her alphabet. She can tell you the first and last names of her immediate family, says please and thank you, yes ma'am and no ma'am, knows what she likes and dislikes, can almost spell her name (still working the kinks on those last 3 letters), throw the hell out of a ball, run fast, cry like she's being stabbed, and laugh until she gets hiccups. She's my sweetheart, my pooh, my baby girl. She will not stand for me calling anyone else any of those. She's my woman. I absolutely love her. God couldn't have given me a better child. I need to write her another letter. I need to tell her how beautiful she is when she sleeps. Sheer perfection. I need to tell her that my wish for her is that she has a healthy, successful life. No matter what happens, I did my best. Lawyer money or teacher money. I will do my best. I love that girl!

Goodnight bloggers!
Posted by Nik :: 6/04/2011 :: 1 Comments:

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